My Soul Cries Out

365 Days of Growing Together 
“Under Construction”

Hi WR2W, my prayer for each of us today and every day is that we be faithful, focused, and fruitful.  I pray that throughout our life we have joy even during the difficult times.  During these difficult times is when we need to draw from the well of joy because life can be very tough.  But what I know, in the depths of my soul, is that Jesus is Joy and He is Lord!  In the good times, I call on Jesus.  In the hard times, I call on our Jesus.  He has been so consistent and so faithful.  He has answered my prayers and blessed me with His ways and delivered me out of the miry clay, and all I can say is thank you Father.  I worship our Father because there is no other like Him. I come before His throne with worship when things appear good, bad, and/or ugly because no matter the state, He is Lord!  Throughout my life, I have endured a tremendous amount of pain, but life experiences have forced me to my knees and taught me how to lean and depend totally on our Father and as a result “I took my troubles to the Lord; I cried out to Him, and He answered my prayer” (Psalms 120:1).  If there is no other advice I can give you, I will be sure to recommend crying out from your soul unto our Lord.  When we cry out to God in our distress and pray to Him for help, the bible says our cries reach His ears and He hears us from His sanctuary (Psalms 18:6), but what really gives me courage and helps me to feel safe and at rest is the fact that He does not leave our soul in tears, but He reaches down from heaven and rescues us and draws us out of deep waters and from our powerful enemies (Psalms 18:16-17).

WR2W, as I reflected on crying out from my soul, I could only remember 1 time in my life when I really cried out to the Lord from the depth of my soul for His help and that was 4 months ago when my mom was diagnosed with cancer.  I felt completely helpless.  There have been so many other times when I have gone to the Lord for healing for other family members and friends, but nothing seemed as hard as that time.  In 2013, when the doctors gave up my aunt Lisa, it never crossed my mind that she would not make it, I knew without a shadow of a doubt that she would live a full and healthy life.  When the doctors said 1% chance, I heard the Holy Spirit say 100% chance and that settled it.  But when it came to my mom, I did not hear all is well and I was scared.  The day my mom took the biopsy, I was in the office with her watching the surgeon and I began to ask Him the questions I heard the Holy Spirit utter to me.  I began to feel unsettled because I knew it was cancer and I heard Him say move her immediately.  That same day when we left the doctor’s office and I was driving us home, I heard the Holy Spirit say, sarcoma.  This was amazing and nerve-racking at the same time.  Amazing because He was preparing me and nerve-racking because I did not want this to be true.  However, I guess my face told when I heard the voice of God and/or maybe it was when my mood suddenly became somber because my mom asked me what was wrong.  I cannot remember the exact words I told her, but I remember looking at her and saying no matter what the results say we know that God is in full control and she was alright.  She looked at me and said, she was not worried because she did not have cancer.  Although, I think at that moment, she knew I heard something because I was too quiet, her soul was crying out to the Lord and she knew He heard her cry and she remained faithful and unmovable.

WR2W, I did not respond to my mom’s question of what was wrong because at that moment, I did not know what to say.  My emotions took over and my mind was not at rest.  I begin to google on my phone the word sarcoma.  It was a long ride home for me because I wanted to be strong for my mom and appear as if I was unbothered.  I wanted to prepare my mother for what she was about to hear so before we returned the next week for the results, I told her what I heard the Holy Spirit say and she said ok, but I don’t have cancer.  Again, she had cried out to the Lord and He had answered her, so it was no need to worry and accept what she did not have.  Needless to say, I learned so much from my mom, a woman of strong faith.  So, we continued with the process and the following week, we went for the results, and were prepared to hear the words cancer and sarcoma, and this was exactly what we heard.  We were given a paper that said leiomyosarcoma and the size of the tumor, which was really small, but learned later that it was large for the area it was located.  However, to make a lengthy story short, my journey of crying out to the Lord from the depths of my soul and trusting Him like never before began.  My mom was alright and emotionally was doing far better than me.  Early the next morning after receiving the results, it had to be about 3 or 4 AM, I cried from the depths of my soul and asked the Lord to heal my mom and extend her years.  I remember saying Lord for her faithfulness, remove this unclean spirit from my mother’s body and send it to a barren land that it shall never rise against her again and extend her years upon this Earth that she may complete Your work.  I cried so much I became weak and quiet.  The next day, Bishop Anderson stop by to see me and I began to cry again and shared with Him what I heard the Holy Spirit say to me.  And he began to pour into me and bring me into a deeper understanding of the Holy Spirit and the revelation in which He gives.

WR2W, I share with you all of this to let you know that the Holy Spirit reveals to us so we can go into prayer with revelation on what exactly to come against.  It is for us to wage war through the power of the Holy Spirit against the Satanic attacks of the enemy.  It was not until I cried out from my soul, that I entered into a greater dimension of knowledge and understanding.  Something happened to me that morning that is unexplainable.  I felt a feeling like never before and became completely vulnerable before the Lord.  I was stripped of pride, and the walls came down.  I was completely helpless and realized that this was a job only for Jesus and my natural intellect and medical knowledge was not going to get me through this one.  I don’t care how many classes I took in college, graduate school, and/or medical school, none of them gave me peace and if anything, they made me more nervous because naturally I knew that this cancer was a beast.  It was only the way of the Holy Spirit that pulled me through this one and recognizing the voice of God that gave me peace and assurance that all was indeed well!  My Sisters, I encourage each of us to cry out to Lord and cast all our cares on Him because He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7) and will answer our prayers.  I love each of you, be blessed, be encouraged, and be true!

A Continual Cry from My Soul

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